Heather Klemanski

Mindfulness & Self-Compassion Teacher

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Acceptance for the Win

When you find yourself feeling stuck and frustrated, and perhaps repeating the same pattern over and over again and not sure how to change it, then a way to make the change is to take a fresh look at the situation.  

Questions to Ask:

What is your current perspective?  Do you feel like maybe something isn’t fair?  Do  you think that you want it to be different than it is?  Are you holding on to a thought that if only the situation were a certain way that everything would be better..different…easier…or whatever you’re telling yourself..this is where you it is helpful to do some investigative work..to explore within yourself to see what you may be thinking and feeling..  As you examine your thoughts and feelings about the situation, ask yourself, what is that I don’t want to accept?  What is it that makes me uncomfortable?   

As you ask yourself these questions, it will not be an easy process and you may find yourself not willing to go deeper into the situation  but as you do, you will start to see the situation from a new perspective. By looking at it from a fresh perspective, this allows you to start to accept the facts, just as they are.  To accept reality without trying to add your wishes for how you want it to be.  You can then start to ask yourself if you can truly accept it.

A different way to look at it…

Instead of looking at it as why is this happening to me.  What would it be like if you ask yourself, what can I learn from this?  How can I grow from this?  What do I need to know from this situation that I don’t already know?  There may be some painful emotions that arise as you go through this process.  It can be challenging to look at reality and face it.    Sitting with this painful emotion is going to be hard.  No doubt about it.  But that’s where the healing is.  This is where the growth is.  True growth happens when you step outside of your comfort zone.  Healing happens when you can befriend your pain and accept it.  It takes courage to turn towards that which we don’t want to.   When you can embrace those negative emotions that are painful and know that they will not last, you are on the path for opening the door towards understanding yourself and your life more deeply and richly and creating the life that is connected, inspired, and meaningful to you.

Renewal

With Spring right around the corner and with it being synonymous with renewal, I’ve been thinking about how this is the perfect time to clear out my house a little bit and do some spring cleaning. 

So I went through my closets, piling up clothes I haven’t worn in a long time and don’t plan to wear again.  I cleaned out the storage room and removed old Christmas and Halloween decorations.  With each piece that I put into the donation pile, I felt lighter.   It felt as though I was freeing myself.   I allowed myself make room and space in my home and open it up just a little more. 

Why we need a clean up too..

This kind of cleaning makes me think about how as humans, we need to do some decluttering too from time to time.   It is benefical for us to clear out old beliefs and ways of thinking.  It can be easy to hold on to belief systems that you have had for a long time because it has become a default way of thinking.  But as you grow and evolve and learn new ways, similar to computer software, those old thought patterns can become outdated and will need an update. 

Otherwise, the old ways of thinking are going to hold you back and keep you stuck.  And nobody wants that!  So maybe it’s time to take a look around..inside yourself..and ask….

Are there any outdated thoughts you have about yourself that can use some updating?